Racing in the Rain

It has been a while since my last post. I have been so busy in the last couple of months I just haven't had the time. I figured now, before the holiday rush really gets started I needed to make an update. Thankfully, my health has continued to hold steady. Over the past six weeks, I have been training for a 5K that I will run on December 8. I was an avid runner before my M.S. diagnosis. Since my diagnosis I have not done any running. In October a friend encouraged me to join her in this 5K and I decided I would see if it was something that I could do again. I have been able to push myself to places I thought were long gone. I have remembered why I loved running so much. I love the feel of just running and not having to think about anything or be responsible for anyone except myself. This is my happy place. I am currently reading "The Art of Racing in The Rain" by Garth Stein. As a dog lover, this book is tugging at my heart strings. The author writes about the life of a dog and his race car driver owner, highlighting their closeness and ability to understand each other. One particular section stuck out to me as I read and re-read it several times. As the owner explains to his dog the art of race car driving in the rain he outlines how a driver must always stay in control of his mind and his vehicle in slippery situations in order to stay on the track. While the driver does not always end up where he hoped to be he is still in control of his vehicle and is able to act in a positive manner. He is still able to create an ending to his story and complete the race. I realized how similar this was to my own life. As long as I stay in a positive frame of mind and in control, I might not end up where I expected but I will compete and complete in my own life. As I was walking in to church this morning I realized that at this time last year I had just found out that my disease was still progressing. I began new treatment at the end of December last year and this past year has been so full of blessings and surprises. So maybe I won't be the fastest runner at the 5K, but two years ago I never imagined that I would be able to run again. I thank God everyday for ALL of my blessings!

Never Back Down

The title of this blog is how I feel about life. I am approaching the two year mark of my diagnosis. I was looking back at the early posts on this site and I am amazed at how my mind set has changed, and how I have personally changed. The voice in my early posts was a little more frustrated than in my later posts. I have certainly learned to deal with the pitfalls and obstacles that M.S. carries. I am reminded daily that everyday is a gift to be cherished. Since I began my new medicine last December it seems that my symptoms have been better controlled. This has allowed me to focus my energy on my classroom. Last week I was notified that I am one of the 24 semi finalists for the KY Teacher of the Year award. This means more to me than I could ever express in words. There was a point two years ago where I was afraid that I would not be able to teach. I have had many doors shut but so many more opened and this is a testament to what believing and having faith can produce. As I prepare today to board a plane to Atlanta to begin my speaker training with the drug company that makes my M.S. medication, I am reflecting on the past two years with a full heart. M.S. has certainly taken many things from me, however, I have gained so many things as well.

Bring on the Rain

The title of this month's blog is fitting both because it rained all weekend and I have had a really bad past few days symptom wise. One of the frustrating things about having MS is that since most of the symptoms are not visible it takes someone who really knows me to know when I'm feeling bad. Otherwise I push through. Over the past five days I had a digestive problem that I developed as part of this crazy disease called paralytic illius. This basically means that my brain doesn't send the message to my digestive system to work and it shuts down. When it begins to work again it feels like my stomach turns itself inside out multiple times. Needless to say, I spent Friday night until today in bed. Today I have been able to eat a little and my energy is back up a little. I know my usual posts are more uplifting but I think it is important to understand that this is not a cake walk by any means. I mask lots of symptoms because I enjoy my job and my family but at times, my body just says enough! I hope my brain and my stomach are back on the same page. I am looking forward to my trip to Atlanta at the end of Sept. to begin my work as an ambassador for the Novartis drug company! This will be another chapter in my MS Story.

Sharing the Journey

I am so excited to share with you an amazing new opportunity that I have been offered. As you know, this past December I began a new drug therapy for my M.S. I have had great success with this medication, and because of this I was approached by the drug company that manufactures the therapy to become an ambassador. I did a phone interview about two months ago and figured that was probably it. Last week I was called by the company again to find out if I would be willing to speak to groups of M.S. Patients about my journey and my success. Again, I said yes and figured I would probably not hear much. At the end of September, the drug company will be flying my husband and me to Atlanta for an all expense paid weekend of speaker training. Of course he will be along for moral support, he is not much of a public speaker! I am very excited about this chance to share my journey with others who are going through the same things I have been through. From the beginning of my diagnosis the one thing I have wanted to do is to make a positive impact on others who suffer. While this is never a cake walk, life can continue and I hope to show others how I have made this happen!

Another Year Older

I have been in the mode to do some reflecting in the last few days. June 14th, Aaron and I will celebrate our 4 year wedding anniversary, June 19th Jordan and I will celebrate our birthdays (big 16 for him!), June 17th we will celebrate Father's Day, and June 27th Lyndsey will turn 15. With all of those things time to reflect has to be stolen here and there, but to me it is important. Aaron and I are continually amazed and thankful for the trials that God has brought us to AND through. It is awe inspiring at times. I cannot believe that my first born, Jordan, will be driving. I had him on my 19th birthday, still a baby myself, not a clue in the world what I would do with him when they made me leave the hospital, and then just over a year later in the same place with Lyndsey. In the following days after coming home from the hospital with her and a one year old in tow, I spent a lot of nights by myself wondering why God trusted me enough to give me not one but two small lives to take charge of. Whatever the reason, I knew that I would give it the best shot that I could. We have grown together and I often feel a little bad for my husband who was just one person coming into the bond of three people! This leads me to Father's Day. I have often heard that girls gravitate towards men that are similar to their own fathers. I think I got pretty close. My husband's parenting style reminds me so much of my own Father's style, hard working, no nonsense with a soft side. (Lyndsey seems to have the only free pass straight to the soft side!) since my diagnosis with MS in 2010, I have said more than once that God waited to put this on me until I had someone to lighten my load. I fully believe this. Without him, WE wouldn't have made it through the last two years. He picks up with the kids right where I am not able. I realized the other day that Jordan probably goes to him more than he comes to me, and that is monumental to me. With all of the things I have to be thankful for, I hardly have time to think about the rest!

The past month has been busy with preparing for testing and finishing up softball and baseball seasons with the kids. I am ready for summer, yet sad to see this year come to a close. This has been the best year of my career for many reasons. I have worked hard to try to take care of myself, but I had a small setback and relapsed. I had some problems with my legs and had trouble walking. I am past it now, but I made the decision this time to not have a three day steroid infusion. It was tough to push through the pain but I did it. Today I spent an hour on a phone interview with the company that makes my MS medication. I will be a volunteer ambassador for the Novartis drug company, helping other patients to understand their diagnosis and the medication. This is just another step for me towards turning this from a disability to an ability. I believe this is all in God's plan for me! I am looking forward to a restful summer!

Counting My Blessings

Today as I sat in the office of my MS doctor waiting to get my blood drawn, I noticed what a beautiful green the trees are and how crystal blue the sky appeared. Maybe it is the early arrival of this beautiful weather, or, maybe it was because for once in this journey that I have been on, I got a great report. I started the new and only form of pill therapy for MS in December. This medication is not a cure, however it is supposed to decrease the amount of relapses. Until now, I had been having about three relapses a year. Currently, I have not had a relapse in six months. This is the longest amount of time I have gone relapse free. We are praying that this means the medicine is doing what it is supposed to do. I still have the fatigue, and some leg pain, usually at the end of the day, but I can handle that. My doctor told me that I can begin a twice a year visit rotation instead of every three months. I am so happy to say that I have also been asked by the drug company to be an ambassador for other MS patients struggling with this disability and the medication choices available. For now though, I am ready to enjoy my spring break!

Live and Learn

The insert that comes with my medication clearly states that this particular medicine causes the immune system to become weak.  They are not kidding. I got a stomach bug last week, in fact I had to run out of my classroom throwing up one day. I haven't really had any kind of virus since my diagnosis so I didn't know how hard this would hit me. After two days at home and one night in the hospital, I learned my lesson. When I am sick, I am SICK! So with some advice from my family doctor, next time I will rest.

I have felt wonderful despite the small set back last week. I have begun working out with water weights at an indoor pool, walking more often, and am looking forward to some golf with my husband now that it is beautiful weather. All I can hope for is no more viruses! I go back to see my MS doctor over spring break, please add me to your prayers as I continue to pray as well for continued good news.

No News is Good News

That is certainly the way I like to look at things! I realized I had not posted on here in quite some time. It could be because over all I have been feeling so good, or it could be because I have been busy with teaching and keeping up with Jordan and Lyndsey. What ever the reason, the best part is, I am able to do all of these things. I am not looking through rose colored glasses. I have bad days, days when I come home from school and collapse onto my bed with fatigue, and spend most weekends recharging for the week ahead. Regardless, I am just so happy to be where I am at work and in life. I have adjusted well to the new medication that I started over Christmas break. I am so thankful for that, and for my friends who lookout for me and remind me when I forget, that I need to slow down.