Just Breathe...

I love this quote "Isn't it crazy how we look back a year ago and realize how much everything has changed? The amount of people that have left your life, entered, and stayed... The memories you won't forget and the moments you wish you did." That pretty much sums up how things have been since the last post. For those of you that have followed this journey with me from the beginning, there have been a lot of changes in my life, some good and some great. One of the biggest changes has been the ending of my marriage and embarking out on a new chapter of my life. I believe in total honesty so its important to note that M.S. was a major point of contention in that relationship. M.S. changes things, it changes people and it changes perception. Not everyone is cut out to handle it we just accept that and move on. I have continued to run and workout very regularly and have even started two beginners running groups. I want to model for other women that disabilities do not have to sideline us from being healthy and living the best life we can live. My M.S. has continued to stay pretty quiet, I have a few days here and there, like this morning in which the hands and the eyes just wouldn't work together, I have headaches sometimes but over all I am miles and miles away from where I was when this hit me almost four years ago. I remember thinking to myself in my first post that my life as I knew it was probably over. I will admit that as my sister drove me home from Nashville after my first round of steroid infusions the first week of my diagnosis, that I was angry and I felt cheated. I feel that for anyone facing a life changing health issue it is important to be honest at some point about your feelings. Little did I know that God was using this not as a set back but as a spring board. Over the past few months I have met someone who is pretty special in my life and he is always reminding me that he is in my corner. Most days I am a pretty tough girl, but some days that little reminder that people are cheering for your success and not waiting for your fall is worth more than anything in the world. The M.S. is always there, and even though it will never go away, it is a reminder for me not of my struggles but of how lucky I really am!

No Weapon Formed Against Me...

I have seen the verse from Isaiah 54:17 that is the title of this blog many, many times. Even though I consider the book of Isaiah to be one of my favorite go to books, I never realized how much that verse "No weapon formed against you shall prosper" really meant to my life. It was about four years ago that I really started realizing something was wrong with me. I remember that the school year was over, and I had a lot of time on my hands but that I couldn't enjoy that time because I couldn't get off the couch for very long. I was so, so tired all of the time. It wasn't just a regular tired, it was a hit by a truck kind of tired and on most days there was no real reason for this! I remember telling my husband something just doesn't seem right. Then a couple of weeks after that I had my first episode in the middle of the night where I couldn't move my legs. Shortly after that we found out I had a small tumor on the base of my brain. We thought "ok, now we know" but little did we know that wasn't the root of the problem. It would take months, and many more appointments to find out that the real culprit was M.S. Fast forward four years, I just came in from a tough work out with my trainer, it was leg day and anyone who works out knows that leg day is the worst day! While I was struggling through a few of my reps at the end of the workout I was thinking about where I was four years ago and how I never imagined that I would be here, right now, not in the best shape by far, but in the best shape of my life. I often wonder about another saying that I hear pretty often, "God gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers". M.S. is certainly a battle, I don't know without this diagnosis if I would have pushed myself to run a 5k nearly every weekend, or to run another half marathon this year, or to do zumba like a maniac, or even to put myself through the pain and torture of working out with my trainer! I was doing some reps with the sled today along side some high school volleyball girls. We were all struggling a little bit and while they were starting to get a little silly I realized they are there because they are young and they are trying to get better at their sport, I am there because...I chose to be...because I can't stand the thought of ever going back to the place that I was four years ago...because I want to inspire others to never give up. I know that I am blessed, I thank God many times a day for where I am. I still have bad days, don't get me wrong, but right now I am beating the odds!

It's been awhile...you know what that means!

Wow, it certainly has been a while since my last post. Those of you who have followed me since the inception of this blog know that when it has been a while my health is good. Since my health has been so great, I have been super busy with workouts and running. Now that basketball season is over and I have a few weeks to myself I have really tried to amp it up. I met with my MS specialist about a month ago and he was amazed at the progress I have made since my diagnosis three and a half years ago. He actually showed me a chart that is supposed to be a good predictor of mobility later in the disease. Based on where I am now he feels that my good mobility will continue. He attributes this to a combination of the right medication, my fitness level, and cleaner eating habits. When I began this journey three and a half years ago I was taking around 12 pills a day. I am down to three! We all know that MS hits everyone differently so I am not saying that if you have MS and you do what I am doing you too will have the same results. What I am saying is that there is power in positive thinking. I decided when I started running again a year and a half ago that I was going to do this when I felt good and not feel guilty when I didn't. I have way more good days than bad! I went through the calendar and added up that I competed in 25 5K's last year and a half marathon. I plan to do just as many 5K's this year and TWO half marathons. My running buddy and I are both super busy with our day jobs and our kids so we have started getting a mile in while our students are at lunch and then getting the rest of our runs in at night. I also do Zumba two to three times a week. Anyone who has ever told you that Zumba is just a bunch of people dancing around has clearly never been. It is a FULL BODY workout, but it is so awesome and empowering. I can only thank God for the strength and energy to work and be fit. This definitely didn't seem like the hand I would be holding when the doctor said "You have M.S." I'll try hard to do better at updating but the weather is getting good, so you know... no news is good news!

I Run This

Taking a peek back at the last post it has been a few months since I have updated. Summer has come and gone and I am back into the full swing of school. Health wise I had a fabulous summer, only had a small set back two weeks ago when I picked up this summer cold that everyone has had and it took me almost as long to beat it. Anyone who knows anything about MS knows why that is! I am almost back to full speed ahead and it is a good thing because tomorrow I am running a 5K to raise money for the MS Society. As I was laying out my clothes for the race tomorrow I realized I am fast approaching the three year anniversary of my diagnosis, in fact I am just about 20 days out. As I think back to that day and all that went through my mind, and I recall physically how I felt, running let alone running a 5K wasn't anything I ever expected to be in my future. This will be my 17th 5K in 9 months, I would say I am beating the odds! Tomorrow will not be about me, tomorrow will be about all of my fellow MS'ers. Tomorrow will be about those who are unable to enjoy a quality of life they once knew, tomorrow will be about raising money to find a cure for this monster that has taken so much from those of us who have to live our lives everyday knowing that right now there is no cure. I am lucky, by the grace of God I am able to live a somewhat normal life but it it cannot be said enough that you should not judge my disability by my outward appearance. Just the other day a good friend mentioned how I seem to have beat my MS and in response to that I said that I suffer everyday. I have vision issues, I even have cognitive issues from time to time, but I know that life has to go on and I have to get up and go everyday that I can. Please continue to pray for a cure, some are not as blessed as I have been.

The View From Here

I found this quote while I was doing some research for another piece of writing and I felt that it was so fitting "I run because it's so symbolic of life. You have to drive yourself to overcome the obstacles. You might feel that you can't. But then you find your inner strength, and realize you're capable of so much more than you thought" --Arthur Blank This is my life! The last time I posted I was preparing for my first 5K. As I write this post I am trying to count in my head and I think I am up to 8 5K's and preparing for my first 1/2 Marathon next month. Last year at this same time I was using a cane on some days and sometimes at night if I had to get up. As I was packing tonight for another trip with the company that makes my MS medication (this time to Dallas), and thinking about my journey, I can't believe how much my life has changed since I first heard those words "you have MS". I remember my world feeling like yahtzee dice that had been shaken and spilled onto a table. I didn't know what was ahead, I didn't really even know how I was going to handle it. All I knew for sure was that I had a life that wasn't going to wait for me to figure it out. So many things have happened since that time that have put life into perspective. One of those being my mom's breast cancer diagnosis. I feel like she and I draw strength from each other. The farther we see the other step out onto the limb the more we draw strength within ourselves. My kids have gone from awkward pre-teens to drivers! As I slowly but surely release the stronghold I have had on them, I know that I have to have a life of my own as they move on with theirs. I have said before that I don't want to sugar coat what this disease really does to me, I still have days where my thought process is a little foggy and I have to consciously go through every step in my head while doing something as simple as washing my hair. Some days I don't really feel like going for that run after school, but then I remember there have been days when I couldn't get out of bed, and, sadly there could at anytime be more days like that. There are days that I get half way into my run and ask myself what I am trying to prove and who I am trying to prove it to... the answer is simple: I am trying to prove that I can still have a normal life. As I begin to wind down the school year I also remember how much strength I draw from my students. On the days that my body says stay in bed today, I remember that there is a student or two that is depending on me. The one thing I know for certain is that God gives his toughest battles to his strongest students. I hope I am living up to the task. My running partner Terri, she pushes me when I am weak, she PHYSICALLY pushes me! Dirty Girl Mud Run 2013

Racing in the Rain

It has been a while since my last post. I have been so busy in the last couple of months I just haven't had the time. I figured now, before the holiday rush really gets started I needed to make an update. Thankfully, my health has continued to hold steady. Over the past six weeks, I have been training for a 5K that I will run on December 8. I was an avid runner before my M.S. diagnosis. Since my diagnosis I have not done any running. In October a friend encouraged me to join her in this 5K and I decided I would see if it was something that I could do again. I have been able to push myself to places I thought were long gone. I have remembered why I loved running so much. I love the feel of just running and not having to think about anything or be responsible for anyone except myself. This is my happy place. I am currently reading "The Art of Racing in The Rain" by Garth Stein. As a dog lover, this book is tugging at my heart strings. The author writes about the life of a dog and his race car driver owner, highlighting their closeness and ability to understand each other. One particular section stuck out to me as I read and re-read it several times. As the owner explains to his dog the art of race car driving in the rain he outlines how a driver must always stay in control of his mind and his vehicle in slippery situations in order to stay on the track. While the driver does not always end up where he hoped to be he is still in control of his vehicle and is able to act in a positive manner. He is still able to create an ending to his story and complete the race. I realized how similar this was to my own life. As long as I stay in a positive frame of mind and in control, I might not end up where I expected but I will compete and complete in my own life. As I was walking in to church this morning I realized that at this time last year I had just found out that my disease was still progressing. I began new treatment at the end of December last year and this past year has been so full of blessings and surprises. So maybe I won't be the fastest runner at the 5K, but two years ago I never imagined that I would be able to run again. I thank God everyday for ALL of my blessings!

Never Back Down

The title of this blog is how I feel about life. I am approaching the two year mark of my diagnosis. I was looking back at the early posts on this site and I am amazed at how my mind set has changed, and how I have personally changed. The voice in my early posts was a little more frustrated than in my later posts. I have certainly learned to deal with the pitfalls and obstacles that M.S. carries. I am reminded daily that everyday is a gift to be cherished. Since I began my new medicine last December it seems that my symptoms have been better controlled. This has allowed me to focus my energy on my classroom. Last week I was notified that I am one of the 24 semi finalists for the KY Teacher of the Year award. This means more to me than I could ever express in words. There was a point two years ago where I was afraid that I would not be able to teach. I have had many doors shut but so many more opened and this is a testament to what believing and having faith can produce. As I prepare today to board a plane to Atlanta to begin my speaker training with the drug company that makes my M.S. medication, I am reflecting on the past two years with a full heart. M.S. has certainly taken many things from me, however, I have gained so many things as well.

Bring on the Rain

The title of this month's blog is fitting both because it rained all weekend and I have had a really bad past few days symptom wise. One of the frustrating things about having MS is that since most of the symptoms are not visible it takes someone who really knows me to know when I'm feeling bad. Otherwise I push through. Over the past five days I had a digestive problem that I developed as part of this crazy disease called paralytic illius. This basically means that my brain doesn't send the message to my digestive system to work and it shuts down. When it begins to work again it feels like my stomach turns itself inside out multiple times. Needless to say, I spent Friday night until today in bed. Today I have been able to eat a little and my energy is back up a little. I know my usual posts are more uplifting but I think it is important to understand that this is not a cake walk by any means. I mask lots of symptoms because I enjoy my job and my family but at times, my body just says enough! I hope my brain and my stomach are back on the same page. I am looking forward to my trip to Atlanta at the end of Sept. to begin my work as an ambassador for the Novartis drug company! This will be another chapter in my MS Story.

Sharing the Journey

I am so excited to share with you an amazing new opportunity that I have been offered. As you know, this past December I began a new drug therapy for my M.S. I have had great success with this medication, and because of this I was approached by the drug company that manufactures the therapy to become an ambassador. I did a phone interview about two months ago and figured that was probably it. Last week I was called by the company again to find out if I would be willing to speak to groups of M.S. Patients about my journey and my success. Again, I said yes and figured I would probably not hear much. At the end of September, the drug company will be flying my husband and me to Atlanta for an all expense paid weekend of speaker training. Of course he will be along for moral support, he is not much of a public speaker! I am very excited about this chance to share my journey with others who are going through the same things I have been through. From the beginning of my diagnosis the one thing I have wanted to do is to make a positive impact on others who suffer. While this is never a cake walk, life can continue and I hope to show others how I have made this happen!

Another Year Older

I have been in the mode to do some reflecting in the last few days. June 14th, Aaron and I will celebrate our 4 year wedding anniversary, June 19th Jordan and I will celebrate our birthdays (big 16 for him!), June 17th we will celebrate Father's Day, and June 27th Lyndsey will turn 15. With all of those things time to reflect has to be stolen here and there, but to me it is important. Aaron and I are continually amazed and thankful for the trials that God has brought us to AND through. It is awe inspiring at times. I cannot believe that my first born, Jordan, will be driving. I had him on my 19th birthday, still a baby myself, not a clue in the world what I would do with him when they made me leave the hospital, and then just over a year later in the same place with Lyndsey. In the following days after coming home from the hospital with her and a one year old in tow, I spent a lot of nights by myself wondering why God trusted me enough to give me not one but two small lives to take charge of. Whatever the reason, I knew that I would give it the best shot that I could. We have grown together and I often feel a little bad for my husband who was just one person coming into the bond of three people! This leads me to Father's Day. I have often heard that girls gravitate towards men that are similar to their own fathers. I think I got pretty close. My husband's parenting style reminds me so much of my own Father's style, hard working, no nonsense with a soft side. (Lyndsey seems to have the only free pass straight to the soft side!) since my diagnosis with MS in 2010, I have said more than once that God waited to put this on me until I had someone to lighten my load. I fully believe this. Without him, WE wouldn't have made it through the last two years. He picks up with the kids right where I am not able. I realized the other day that Jordan probably goes to him more than he comes to me, and that is monumental to me. With all of the things I have to be thankful for, I hardly have time to think about the rest!

The past month has been busy with preparing for testing and finishing up softball and baseball seasons with the kids. I am ready for summer, yet sad to see this year come to a close. This has been the best year of my career for many reasons. I have worked hard to try to take care of myself, but I had a small setback and relapsed. I had some problems with my legs and had trouble walking. I am past it now, but I made the decision this time to not have a three day steroid infusion. It was tough to push through the pain but I did it. Today I spent an hour on a phone interview with the company that makes my MS medication. I will be a volunteer ambassador for the Novartis drug company, helping other patients to understand their diagnosis and the medication. This is just another step for me towards turning this from a disability to an ability. I believe this is all in God's plan for me! I am looking forward to a restful summer!

Counting My Blessings

Today as I sat in the office of my MS doctor waiting to get my blood drawn, I noticed what a beautiful green the trees are and how crystal blue the sky appeared. Maybe it is the early arrival of this beautiful weather, or, maybe it was because for once in this journey that I have been on, I got a great report. I started the new and only form of pill therapy for MS in December. This medication is not a cure, however it is supposed to decrease the amount of relapses. Until now, I had been having about three relapses a year. Currently, I have not had a relapse in six months. This is the longest amount of time I have gone relapse free. We are praying that this means the medicine is doing what it is supposed to do. I still have the fatigue, and some leg pain, usually at the end of the day, but I can handle that. My doctor told me that I can begin a twice a year visit rotation instead of every three months. I am so happy to say that I have also been asked by the drug company to be an ambassador for other MS patients struggling with this disability and the medication choices available. For now though, I am ready to enjoy my spring break!

Live and Learn

The insert that comes with my medication clearly states that this particular medicine causes the immune system to become weak.  They are not kidding. I got a stomach bug last week, in fact I had to run out of my classroom throwing up one day. I haven't really had any kind of virus since my diagnosis so I didn't know how hard this would hit me. After two days at home and one night in the hospital, I learned my lesson. When I am sick, I am SICK! So with some advice from my family doctor, next time I will rest.

I have felt wonderful despite the small set back last week. I have begun working out with water weights at an indoor pool, walking more often, and am looking forward to some golf with my husband now that it is beautiful weather. All I can hope for is no more viruses! I go back to see my MS doctor over spring break, please add me to your prayers as I continue to pray as well for continued good news.

No News is Good News

That is certainly the way I like to look at things! I realized I had not posted on here in quite some time. It could be because over all I have been feeling so good, or it could be because I have been busy with teaching and keeping up with Jordan and Lyndsey. What ever the reason, the best part is, I am able to do all of these things. I am not looking through rose colored glasses. I have bad days, days when I come home from school and collapse onto my bed with fatigue, and spend most weekends recharging for the week ahead. Regardless, I am just so happy to be where I am at work and in life. I have adjusted well to the new medication that I started over Christmas break. I am so thankful for that, and for my friends who lookout for me and remind me when I forget, that I need to slow down.

The speed bumps of life

It has been a busy few weeks and the calendar shows that it will only get busier! I visited my doctor in Nashville the day before Thanksgiving and I was hopeful for really good news. I had been feeling so good, I knew it could only mean I was in the remission phase of this relapsing remitting disease. That was not the news that we received. It appeared that I had more brain lesions and that the lesion on my optic nerve had gotten worse. This means that the injection therapy that I have been using for over a year did not work. Since there is no cure for MS, the only thing to do is to try disease modifying therapies like the injections. My doctor suggested a fairly new therapy that is a pill. He said he has seen success with this method and I was excited about not injecting myself anymore. None if these therapies come without risks or with a gaurantee. With this pill there is the chance of severe macular edema or swelling of the eye nerves. Also, I will have to take the first dose in the office in Nashville because it causes the heart rate to drop. I will have to be monitored for six hours for initial side effects. I will take my first dose next Tuesday during Christmas break. I am praying for a smooth transition.
I have learned to overcome many obstacles and have learned when my body is telling me to slow it down a little bit too. I have had a smooth job transition and fully believe that Godmis using me as a vessel of hope for someone who might need it. My students are a daily reminder to me of why I followed my calling to this profession and I thank God several times a day for the ability and opportunity to do what I do.

Together we can!

Saturday September 24 marked the return of the MS Walk to Paducah KY. It was a rainy morning but the rain stopped just in time for the walk to begin. I was humbled to see my family and friends there to support me, especially Jordan's Tilghman Football teammates who also got up very early to join us! This week will mark the one year anniversary of my diagnosis. As I sat in the stands Friday night and watched my son on the football field, I realized that I am a very lucky girl. I know everyday that EVERYTHING happens for a reason.  I have had some bad days over the past year, but each day I am learning. Learning to live with this sometimes dibilitating disease, learning to support others who have this life altering condition and most of all learning to be an example to my children, my family and my community. We had a great time at the MS Walk and I am excited to do it again next year!

To a New Beginning

This weekend we have been working hard to get moved in to our new home in Paducah. We have been slowly moving over the past few weeks but this weekend we got the majority finished and we are ready to start our new life in our new city. The intent of the move is for me to be close to my new job so that I will be able to rest after school.  I have been teaching at Paducah Middle for a month and I love it. I feel like I am where I am supposed to be, and now we can begin finding our way in the community as well. I have already made a friend in the neighborhood and have found out that her son and Jordan have been friends since the first day of school. I am excited about the possibilities in our new home and look forward to many years here!

What a difference a year makes!

Today I visited Dr.Hunter for my regular follow up. I am approaching the one year anniversary of my diagnosis. This was the first time in a year that I have not had to have a steroid infusion following a visit! What I was told was that while my symptoms point toward a relapse, I could hold off with steroid infusion right now. It is great to get good news. I am feeling great and getting acquainted with my new job. It is really amazing what a difference a year makes!

Please join us in raising awareness for a cure!

Dear Friends and Family,

Fall is around the corner and I’m gearing up for the 2011 Walk MS Paducah to benefit the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. I will walk to help end the devastating effects of MS and I am asking you to join me by making a contribution to support my effort.

The National Multiple Sclerosis Society is dedicated to a world free of MS. They simultaneously fund research for a cure while also helping people who currently live with MS lead more fulfilling lives. There are more than 4,500 people in Kentucky and Southeast Indiana living with MS. I’m walking to make sure the Kentucky-Southeast Indiana Chapter can continue to offer programs each year for people living with MS and their families. I’m walking to help fund research into the cause and cure for MS. I’m walking for those people with MS who can no longer walk. I’m walking because I care.

Please help by making a donation - large or small - to fight MS. Or, why not join me on the day of the event? Become a participant and side by side, as teammates, we can work together to raise the funds to make a difference.

Please help me reach my goal by sponsoring me in the Walk MS and help the National MS Society reach the ultimate goal of a world free of MS.

Sincerely,
MeganStorey

Visit my Participant Center and make a secure, online donation today!

Join Me as a participant in the Walk MS and start making a difference!

To send a donation: Make all checks payable to: National MS SocietyMail to: MeganStoreyP.O. Box 303 78 Elsey StBardwell, KY42023

  

 

A Little Bit Stronger

I was thinking today as Aaron and I were playing in a couples golf tournament where I was a year ago. I do those kind of things from time to time and then it dawned on me.... Today, my life is 100 percent better than it was a year ago! We know what my ailment is and how to control it and now we know what I can and can't do (which isn't much!). The fact that I can play golf for two days is a big improvement! I have to say that I do get pretty tired but the point is I can live life and that is something to be thankful for each and everyday. I hope that others who are experiencing what I am going through are able to find something that helps them enjoy life. That is what helps get me through! I am able to "witness" so to speak to a few others with MS from time to time and keeping a positive attitude and finding happiness is what I try to help them with as well. I praise God for these opportunities.